What's the point of being healthy if people still don't want to fuck you?
Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
your like the ambassador to my penis.
You were fucked up like a footballbat trying to eat gum off your shoe. And that wasn't even the nights lowest point.
How would I get in touch with Carly Rae Jepsen if I wanted to thank her for the loss of my virginity?
Just had the "whores are people too" talk with Mom. Bright side it's Christmas, and I may have been drunk, I don't think she caught on.
im just laying in bed, eating, getting fat, enjoying eating and getting fat, thinking about how i will probably have to get a fat boyfriend.
You were a hurricane of blowjobs and glitter makeup. You came out of the closet and took the house down with it
Closed my eyes in the shower and got really dizzy. Not sure if neurological or result of 4 day vodka binge. Send help.
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
Everyone else's "needs" are getting in the way of my alcoholism.
Randomize
