Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
Broke up w/ my married coworker...work is gonna get weird.
I am three bowls, two beers, and a muscle relaxer into babysitting. What are you doing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They can't keep moving my court date back, i dont know if I'll survive another one of these going away to jail parties.
I dont feel as bad coming home this baked because I gave my 14 year old sister a no drugs talk last night.
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
Would it be weird if I congratulated the guy who almost broke up my marriage for working on the marriage equality bill? You know, thanks for fighting for the sanctity of marriage. Weird, right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I shaved my pubic hair into a heart for valentine's day how much would you judge me?
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
Not only did she fulfill a life long dream of mine of banging in a library, she bought me subway for lunch. I feel like I got the best gold star ever today.
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
If you have been drunk at one point during the day and are going to bed sober that same day, something is very wrong.
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