She rode me to the beat of Baby Got Back. I swear to god.
i left him drunk and in the fetal postion in the shower.
was the water running?
yeah but he said he knows how to swim
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
I'm deleting all the photos of dicks off my phone. This relationship could be serious
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
I hate about 85% of people that I meet. I'm an awful person. In reality my only redeeming qualities are my face, my amazing scissoring skills and the fact that children love me.
True on all accounts.
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
So unofficially, he told me he deleted tinder because of me. I think that's a pretty romantic gesture in 2018.
Randomize
