haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
I just got a ticket for shitting on a sand dune.
how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
you kept telling everyone how your ninja turtle shell also functioned as a backpack
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
The next time you try to involve a tickle me Elmo in my orgasm, I'm leaving you
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
I always hoped that one day I'd have a sex position named in my honor.
You turned to me, winked, whispered "man the harpoons" and walked out with the fat chick
Bang-toberfest begins!!
Yes, he does have a boomerang dick. No matter how many times I throw it away, it keeps coming right back and winds up hitting me in the head.
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
dude it's 9am and i'm still drunk it's too early for sexting
You're not who I thought you were. You've changed.
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