I'm peeing chunks and puking liquid. Did I at least have fun last night?
Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
I just remember thinking, if she falls asleep, I'm totally eating that spilled chex mix right off of her.
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
Not sure if this is better or worse than the discovery that bourbon and hot chocolate is a viable combo
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
Your ankle brace is here and the saw is charged. Grab some vodka that cast is coming off tonight.
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
Randomize
