come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
I just saw a neon sign in a bar window that says, "open to Public" but the L is burnt out.
u know whats better than using ur vibrator? using it w/ jeopardy on in the background and half moaning the correct final jeopardy question. yeah that just happened.
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
once you get past the part where you think youre gonna die, its the most amazing drug ive ever experienced.
I love your family. Oh. And on a completely unrelated note, I know where we can steal a dog.
The cabbie told me fat girls shouldn't wear tight clothes, and that he feels bad for the guys that have to be underneath them, especially because their positions are "very limited" and proceeded to ask me if I had a trash can and if I could throw something away for him. Don't worry though, he promised it wasn't anything "bad". He then handed me a tied up grocery bag with a bunch of wadded up Kleenex that weighed about 3 pounds. To answer your question, yes I made it home. Fml
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
Today was brought to you by the letter B for beer and bourbon and the number fuck you I'm meant to be studying not hungover
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
someday i'll meet a man and who loves me as much as i love getting drunk and starting fires
Randomize
