butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
she called me screaming that i shouldn't ignore her phone calls, because she's not trying to get me to hang out with her and she doesn't want to be my girlfriend, she just wants sex.
what did you do?
i asked her out. that's so hot.
those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
I wonder if I could sublet my bathtub to anyone.
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
He came up and told us to watch as he chugged his beer with no hands. Then asked if he could come drunk swimming with us.
I usually just read books and meditate to an aquatic soundtrack of sea walrus's mating. But ill choose coors light instead
And tell the hostess not to worry, she's narcoleptic and fell asleep on the way to the bar, but she'll be fine in a few minutes.
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
Are you jealous of my sweatsuit? It's how I get men on Tinder.
I'm glad you still love me even when I change pants in the kitchen and demand you spoon me
Apologies that our conversations always turn to butt sex or penis size. I thought we out grew that in our 20's.
Randomize
