She described it as "a squirrel being hit by a hurricane"
Tonight i am praying for god to turn my pussy into apple pie because i cant count the number of times bruce chooses food over sex.
worst night to have a conscience
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was relieved after I found the unopened condom in my pocket. Then I found the open one in the other pocket..
See, not all bad decisions involve my penis.
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
I just realized my life is a timeline of drunken injuries.
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
You had your shirt off checking IDs at the door and you don't even work there
You're not drunk til you wake your roommates up screaming at your ceiling fan
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
Well, I got drunk and told my family about what I expected sexually after a good first date.
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