absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
I think that last shot was nyquil. Please come gte me. WINGS.
Apparently, Mom was less-than-happy about us shotgunning beers before we opened presents.
Can one of you do me a favor? Light a match and throw it into my room. Bc I'm certain I would rather be burned to death than live in this hell I call my life
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
THERE IS SOMEONE IN MY CAR MILKING HERSELF AND TELLING ME TO TRY IT
Hurry there's four guys dressed up as a bachelorette party, one has a condom veil and the rest are selling candy bouquets and asking if anyone wants to get laid for $5
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
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