The doctor wrote 'condom retrieval' on my discharge paper.
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
We talk about tequila and blow jobs the way that normal people talk about the news and the weather.
Article 1, law 1, section 1 of the apartment 25 party handbook: tarp will be purchased prior to any and all future parties. Aforementioned tarp will be placed on floor. Any and all sick patrons must relocate to tarp preceding the event of expulsion of bodily fluids. Failure to do so will result in ejection of guilty patron and banishment of the accused from succeeding party. All patrons must read and sign a copy before entry is granted.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
What not to say at an interview: i can wrap the shit out of some food.
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
Doing laundry. My jeans from last night smell like chicken wings and motor oil.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
FUCK and YOU. times 10. To infinity and beyond. You bastard. Worst. Cockblock. Ever. I'm going to nail your sister.
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
If I get one more "oh yaaaaa he changed your oil" texts, I'm gonna lose my shit
he just used a semicolon in the middle of a sext
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
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