I'll bet she douches with gravy.
I would rather wake up to a truck driver than wake up to her
A 12 year old Canadian kid said I was a pussy for only buying a 28-pack. I fit in better in this country.
If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
My life is like a drunken tornado. All over the place and never passing up fat girls
Douche bag was crowd surfing, sack punched him. Crowd carried him away in a ball of agony. LIFE=COMPLETE.
You called me a pussy and continued to eat an entire jar of peanut butter with only your hand.
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
My book, "How to Live With a Huge Penis" was delivered today. Can't wait to read it in public.
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
Do you feel better now that you've sent me a picture of your dick?
Yep.
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
can we not speak foreign languages when I'm on drugs
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
Randomize
