Dear tim. Christina farted and it smells like kid roses.
the couple across the street's about to bang. go get the popcorn and come join us.
So after we got done with our cardiac arrest patient, I thought how awesome would it be to hook up the defibrillator pads to cook a burrito.
dude... how have they not drug tested you yet?
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity
Due to certain anatomical proportions it was less like fucking and more like childbirth.
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
Do you think it would be a margarita if you just out tequila in a sonic slush?
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
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