I just want to make him a cookie cake that says "you have no chance with me."
after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
I woke on the floor next to a big TV. Apparently I traded my bed for a 52 inch samsung and a box of pop tarts.
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
i watched you ride a mechanical penis. nothing is awkward between us anymore.
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
If I don't get my shit together, I'm going to be one of those really fucked up cases on 1000 ways to die
You know you have done too many drugs when you gum the sugar off your margarita without even thinking twice
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
If this gives you any indication of my current state, I stopped at Meijer after work and bought funyuns, pregnancy tests and chocolate.
Let me get this straight. You stopped mid foreplay to shave your legs?
Um yeah. I wasn't about to shave them if nothing was happening. And I have HBO. It's not like he's the victim here.
Randomize
