so... i had sex tonight
with a midget
nicccce tits for a little person
is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
How do I tactfully ask if the neighbors downstairs can hear me beating it?
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
I just did the math, I've had 8 hours of sleep in the last 3 days. Not sure if that means I am dedicated to my sex life or my job...
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
He just turned down phone sex for hockey and I'm so relieved I'm fucking a straight guy that I'm barely even mad
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
All I remember is me taking my automatic nerf gun getting on top of him and saying..."look whos in control now!"
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
Randomize
