I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
Mother nature decided I wasn't going to be a whore today. Fuck her.
Facebook stalking a girl from Germany is harder then you think.you have to copy and paste all this shit into freetranslations.com then try and piece together an awkward sentence. If only I could put this energy into something productive.
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
I told her I had a small penis. Then replied if Peter Pan won with a dagger then so can I
I'm so hungover I just peed on my hand and left it, didn't wash... Killin it in 2915
I'll like his pictures on Instagram every once and a while so that when he sees my name he is reminded of the best blow job he's ever gotten.
I wish I had a Tina from Bob's Burgers in real life. She would be the best wingman.
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
I had sex upstairs in my parents house, and my mom texted me and said "those raccoons are out of control in the walls."
The Easter sex puns were too abundant
so i realized that he's only my physical relationship and beer is my emotional relationship...
The cat just brought me a bottle opener. I think she's my soulmate.
I'd ask how but then you'd tell me.
Randomize