i was like. eff you dude i'm 100% american. i went to a high school prom and i like springstein songs and i take rides in chevrolets.
You were running around the house covered in syrup, with shredded down pillow feathers on your body screaming "AFLACK!" at everyone
Went home with a guy 2 " his house". Woke up this morn on couch to parents cooking breakfast, piss all over my back and he is no where to be found. That fuckr pissed on me and bounced. His parents are gonna think some drunk bitch pissed their couch.
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
The trashcan full of everclear punch caught on fire...you should probably come home now.
Shitshow foam night was such a success
they wouldnt let me drive the convertible because i was in a bird suit :(
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
I realized my soar muscles form the shape of me leaning over a toilet
I feel asleep with my contacts in, with my arms wrapped around a bottle of vodka. Also... Do we have class today?
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
