think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
thank god he doesn't hang out with everyone else i've had sex with
well, yeah, he can't fit the whole neighborhood in his apartment
It only happened twice. Once we used extra virgin olive oil and once I used saliva and brute force.
operation have a gay friend backfired
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
I woke up to find her cooking breakfast wearing nothing but my Nuggets jersey. I don't think this could end better.
The doctor said 'youre the 2nd youngest person that ive seen with this condition. Thats probably not the silver medal you were looking for today.'
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
I just brought the toaster out onto the porch to light a cigarette, don't talk to me about being desperate.
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
Apparently I yelled "Spring Break 1984" at a drunk couple fighting on the side of the road.
I was just giving a mobile app demo to a client, on my iPhone, when a reminder alert appeared across the page blinking "12pm: go home and give John head". You're an asshole
Hahaha oops.
Randomize
