Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
WTF. you left me with no condoms and you ate all my mac and cheese. scumbag.
I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
she said "can't you just pull out and cum on my face? I hate scooping jizz out of my vag".
I'm assuming you texted me by mistake. you're not jizzing in or on me again, thanks for playing, douchebag.
you know you made some mistakes when your last two boyfriends are both obsessed with women's curling...
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
I just got woken up by some Christians who wanted to talk about the bible. ways to make a hangover even worse for a thousand trebek
Bring fortys. we have the duct tape. its onnn mothafuckaaaa
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
Randomize
