we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
if she mentions anything about chili and my phone, just go with it
my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
Yeah but he's impersonating a gargoyle jumping off of everything. Including the walls.
Look on the bright side. Now you know the number for poison control.
Well, I plan on starting the night dressed as little red riding hood. Then I plan on finishing the night dressed as a shit show in a red cape.
I saw a crackhead in a ballerina outfit riding a bike while waving her hands and one leg in the air. Never seen such talent in my life
I thought he was having it in Athens. Alright. Have fun. Please save my dignity and refrain from talking about my boobs and sexual "abilities". If I have any. I just feel like they are going to ask. Repeat after me. And repeat it 5 more times. This is going to be the phrase you're going to rely on tonight: "I can neither deny or confirm such actions."
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
You handed me an unpeeled grapefruit off the frat basement floor and then took a bite out of it.
You took one look at him and said "let's hope I don't remember this tomorrow" then you took another shot and chased it with a beer.. I guess it was a success.
I think someone shaved off all their pubes in the handicap stall or a werewolf stopped by the office to take a crAzy dump!
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
Randomize
