i just watched my husband get a prostate exam. sex is ruined for me.
Someone sent me a drink from across the bar. It was water.
What a tease, dude. She's giving me emotional blue balls.
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
Says the girl who left her friends to go have phone sex in the bathroom at Michael's
Just found out that the guy I lost my virginity to voted for Gary Johnson. It's almost more upsetting then him ending up being a massive asshole.
If you’re wondering why the bong is outside the garage door just know I was being environmentally efficient by not using the freezer to chill my shit
I keep worrying she's gonna have a repeat of the time the ceiling fan was talking in Chinese
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
