I just saw a hobo shake a payphone until it spat out a bunch of quarters. what a champ.
I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
23 Strangest Things That Gave Dudes A Boner
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
We need to buy some popsicles so we can remind ourselves we're good at this.
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are
These 21 People Shouldn’t Be Giving Dating Advice
remember when I told you about my grandma asking me about my sex scars? Less comfortable than that
Because i love you. And people show love by not letting their friends shit themselves.
I just found a half a joint in my bed. . .don't know if this qualifies as a proud moment or a cry for help
Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats?
I'm pretty sure the guy who was grinding on me while I was trying to get a drink at he bar was one of my tinder matches
He turned on read receipts specifically so i'd know he was ignoring me.