If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
I made out with a deaf person. Also I've been drunk 11 days in a row now.
she called my cock the "semen sword" and then we invented a position called excalibur
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm home with mono, wearing knee high socks, shorts, a stained old shirt, and a surgical mask. He comes over ANYWAY with soup, a gas mask, billions of DVDs, and eats me out. He's either stupid, whipped, or i'm just THAT good.
Turned out the thing on the lampshade was a bloodstain, not a bedbug. We feel much safer now.
My therapist is concerned about your alcoholism.
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
Your life is one shit show away from being a lifetime movie.
Used my brand new sperrys as a trash can to throw up in and woke up with someone's random key in my hair...new year new me:)
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
I have "if found please return to" written in sharpie on my arm, my uterus is rejecting everything, and I have hickies. I must actually be an 18 year old piece of shit girl instead of a responsible 23 year old
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
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