Listen, I'm 30. If it doesnt involve a super soaker and some chicken wings, you can count me out.
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
Tonight when I'm getting a bj from a stripper I'm gonna imagine it's you bobbing down there
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
You don't even know. The entire marching band thinks I'm an alcoholic.
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
HOCKEY BUTTS AND BASEBALL BUTTS HONESTLY DO SOMETHING TO ME
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
He just said "I can't wait to penetrate you tomorrow" I sat in silence for a second...he attempted to save it by saying "I can't wait to enter you".
One of the guys just came in and goes "i walked all the way home with a pumpkin". Night just got better.
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
Randomize
