Fact: Telling a guy he has erectile dysfunction doesn't solve the problem.
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
at this point every shot is just a haymaker to my liver
how was ur day?
this is strictly sexting don't make small talk.
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
I fell asleep in the tanning bed, naked, for an hour and a half and I guess they couldn't wake me up so they called the fire department...and they came in while I was passed out naked...
The night went downhill when he took his pants off at our table and walked up to women saying "Special delivery"
I literally have anal toys soaking in the bathroom sink and dinner on the stove. If that doesn't scream "domestic goddess", I don't know what the fuck does.
Worst case scenario- he paid me for sex with meatloaf. There are worse thing, right? I mean at least is was good meatloaf.
Going overboard is basically 75% of my personality
I'm a gorgeous hot mess
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
Can I bother you for a second.
You always bother me but go on.
Just saw a girl I banged wearing a pro life shirt downtown. Not sure where to start with that.
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