hey babe thanks for tonight, it was fun.
to be honest, i wanna fuck your friend.
She looked at it and said "your dick is like the golden gate bridge."
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
you were exchanging tortilla chips with the guy at the next table, telling him your table was given the "big chips" because it was your 21st birthday
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Cops busted the party. A kid dressed as a dinosaur tried to crawl out the bathroom window but his tail got stuck. It took 3 cops to pry him out.
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
Judging by my bruises, I know I took more than one tumble. I probably pulled u down w me, and then punched you in the knee. Been trying to find a place to fix my phone between naps today. Almost no place accepts hand js as currency these days. 2013 is gonna be expensive and whorey.
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
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You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
Like I just asked Greg why I don't have a crown for my vagina. That drunk.
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
Its 9 am & i've been cleaning for 6 hours now with occasional crying bursts and two cocktails. Adulting 101.
Randomize