its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
In a meeting with the accounting department. This shit is even more boring in real life and there isn't a professor to wake me up.
Yeah he had his two razors labeled "face" and "pubes". Should I be disgusted or impressed?
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
Something about getting whistled at in my work clothes while crossing the street with three Nuvarings in my back pocket feels wrong.
They want yo temporarily sterile ass.
I left when you were using your mug to lay on the street and ask for spare change
I'm permanently fucked. Every liquid I put into my mouth automatically tastes like fireball.
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
Let's get this straight. I am six fucking feet tall. Do you even understand how limited my options in guys to date are? No. Did you see my last three boyfriends? I looked like a fucking giant next to them. So I will fuck this six-foot-seven Italian model even if I am the ugliest girl at this party because, goddammit, I deserve to.
Randomize
