I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
I never want to see another naked old woman again.
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
They have chocolate covered tequila candy at work. This is not a drill. May be drunk by noon.
Hey to make you feel better about last night, I just shit my pants.
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
Just got flashed by an entire bus of girls in school uniforms. We then had to wait beside each other at a light. It was awkward.
Just killed a snake in my bed! And by killed I mean hit repeatedly with my fist. And by snake I mean a lump in the covers. And I pissed my pants.
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
He just unloaded a dump truck full of red flags on my head.
I felt like I should've driven him home but I was holding in a fart and just needed him to leave
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
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