i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
the first call I got in the morning was from visa fraud prevention so yeah it was one of those nights
you left a note on your car that said " please dont tow, im to drunk to drive. safety first!"
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
You said your legs stopped working and then pulled yourself around the floor with your hands.
That explains the wood chips stuck in my nipples.
I think that's why god made me a woman. Bc it's harder to slap people in the face with a vagina.
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
Dude at the bar last night came into the bathroom, drop kicked the stall open and start saying lines from happy Gilmore as he was shitting, "go in your home! Are you too good for your home?!"
I was gonna be Romantic and write your name in emoji eggplants but A's are hard
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
He gave me a back massage while we were fucking.
Did you get that?
WHILE WE WERE FUCKING.
I know you told me I shouldn't go see him...that's why I'm texting you letting you know I made it home safe from his house this morning
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