How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
I just smelled my beer. It smells like coming home.
And then he asked the cop "shall i shut off the lady gaga?" as he was being frisked.
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
hey i found one of your nipple clamps under my couch, i miss you!
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
not sure if I should be concerned that my brother just stormed into my room and looked at me with a serious face and said, "I'm a peacock, you have to let me fly." oh, vicodin...
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
I am not being the messenger for your booty call.
I spoon fed you cheerios when you were black out drunk. You owe me one.
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
Only good thing about the 50 Shades is that it is now completely OK to call a credit card co to dispute the charge for nipple clamps that didnt arrive.
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