So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
I have no idea what happened last night, but you're the only person I remember smashing my face into. Be honored.
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
You got in the cab and told the cab driver "we only have seven bucks so you better drive fucking fast".
you were feeling the wall and when we asked you why, you just said "because I want to know who lived here before"
Oh my god did you actually lose a tooth
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
Stocking up on Wasabi powder. Nobody's tampons are safe.
If God is analyzing my life right now extremely proud or dissapointed but either way I took wednesday night drinkin to new levels
The next morning I found her spread eagle asleep on the living room floor and he was asleep with his head in her crotch. I needed a ride and had to wake them up.
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
Randomize
