Apparently at one point I was wearing my sweatshirt backwards like it was normal and then I threw up into the hood. Never drinking again.
at home by myself drinkin the left over champagne from my party... who says my birthday has to end?
Weddings at vineyards should never be allowed to happen. I'm pretty sure I drank every bottle they produced in 2008.
Protocol on turning down a date from someone in the House of Representatives?
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
I don't think I will ever be as happy about anything as this man next to me on the bus eating Taco Bell.
I'd tell u there's strippers to make you get here faster, but that would be a blatant lie... There's strippers here.
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
He was so drunk we almost didn't even make it to his place because he didn't know where he lived
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
well apparently i sat in the bathroom staring in the toliet at my vomit. it was blue. how was your night?
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
Randomize
