I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
Dude. Fucked her last night. Fucked her this morning. went downstairs for water. took 18 pack of Coors Light instead and took it back to my gf's. Got a blow job from her. Drinking the beer on my deck now. Best Day ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and in the morning, while we were eating breakfast, she was all " i think someone sneezed into my shirt..." she'll never know.
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
Also, did that cop draw hearts on everyone's hands last night?
I apparently spent $173 at the bar last night. The proof is in the vomit on my pillow and the receipt I tried to clean it up with.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't really know how to say this, but I have an oven mitt to return to you tomorrow..
Just watched an entire Mariachi band walk of shame home together. Halloween at its finest
Who spent today in nothing but a vajazzle and candy thong? SORRY NOT SORRY
His idea of a night out is drinking beer in the driveway. He's been on house arrest too long
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
Im so unlucky if I fell in a barrel of dicks, I'd come our sucking my thumb
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