You know that restaurant that is like over by home depot?
That shitty one? I heard the food sucks there
It's my parent's restaurant
and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
you were fixing your hair in the bathroom mirror and then fell backwards through the locked stall while she was in mid pee and fell on her lap.
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
It's all fun and games until your AARP eligible neighbors end up blacking out in your yard at 5pm with a box of franzia. I'm feeling a great year ahead
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
I WANT PIZZA BUT I ALSO WANT SELF ESTEEM
BUT LIKE WHO AM I TO EVER CARE ABOUT SELF ESTEEM
I'm sorry for drunkenly throwing a spoon at you and then laughing at your pain.
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
I feel awkward having to tell people “sorry you can’t finger me because I will get a UTI and I don’t have health insurance”
Randomize
