i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
Why the fuck is BBQ sauce coming out of my shower head?
why do the even put the "Please drink responsibly" on tequila ads? like has anything responsible ever come from tequlia. No. never.
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
Putting the night light in my bathroom cabinet was the best idea ever. Awesome for puking while light sensitive
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
Don't ask me how or why, but I'm drunk with German diplomats. Come over. Now
She left me naked in my bed and without my phone I had her give me her phone number on the calculator on my laptop. It might be fake.
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
Well the good news of being walked in on, my mom says your tits are pretty. Then she added that hers were like that once. Fml
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize
