The girl I brought home was really impressed with the pile of blow you were doing while watching "Intervention."
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
sometimes when i'm drunk i choose the spanish option on the ATM to challenge myself.
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
I'm being responsible and going as a gay, slutty Mormon missionary. It's responsible because I'll have a bike helmet on for when I fall over because I'm too shitfaced to stand upright. It's safer than Count Fagula. I just need to come up with a line equal or greater than "Blaaaa I want to suck your dick"
OH YEAH AND FORGOT TO THANK YOU FOR THE lack of WARNING THAT HE WASN'T CIRCUMSIZED.
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
you did that thing you do when youre drunk where you rant about bruce springsteen, start hooking up with someone and then pass out midway through
After we finished having phone sex he proceeded to serenade me with Ave Maria. It was magical.
I was walking out of the bar when he said I'll see you later and I said I'll see you in my dreams and then fell face first and broke my nose
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
Randomize
