She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
Remember me drinking the vodka from in between your legs?
When I realised he had a girlfriend I just started telling them about my ex and how I write poetry about him. Which I then read to them. They just gave me pity looks and left me to finish my spliff alone.
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
Listen you let me know what you're doing after drinking rum punch all morning
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
Apparently she "missed me" and the only logical solution was to fuck my brother.
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
Randomize
