I haven't been this sober since birth.
Ive had to apologize to every girl i know today because of you
My room should be renamed "Land of the Misfit Condoms."
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
What type of outfit says "I know you slept with my boyfriend before and are also way skinnier than me, but I look better...somehow"
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You should come by for the fire station blow job tour
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
Only you could go on vacation to visit family and hook up with a pro NFL player from Tinder
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
On a side note. I slept with a stuffed giraffe last night. Found it in my bed when I came home and snuggled with it. Drunk me reverted to being 2
Randomize