You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
I think I just sat on my labia. Can I borrow some scotch tape?
Would you want me to push you down the stairs OR throw you a baby shower?? Real talk
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The only piece of furniture in the apartment is a wine rack.
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
These margaritas aren't just going to regret themselves.
I thought you should know that there is a scientific law stating that when there is booze, people talk about your dick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm drunk at McDonald's in a fairy costume at 10 am nearly two weeks after Halloween. I don't think the Ohio State fans get it.
So that groomsmen was naked under his kilt. Also I just had sex in the elevator. And yes, those two updates are definitely related.
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
When she introduced her friend to me I shook his hand and told him not to leave his ugly vest at my apartment in the morning. He took it off and bought me a shot.
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
My shower turned into a bath, turned into me lying on the shower floor with the water running over me... That hung over..
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