This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
This concert is like a reunion of all my bad sex.
i made the cop pinkie-promise not to arrest me if i failed the breathalizer.
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
Balcony sex scratched the shit out of my phone. Whups.
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
So my mom and I were talking about what I should get you for christmas. She made it clear I cannot get christmas lingerie.
Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
No it'll be my boobs and the luge part will be from my nipples. Everyone will be sucking beer from my perfectly sculpted and partially melted tits.
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
Randomize
