The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
she showed up with nothing but olive garden breadsticks in her purse.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the potatoes in the margarita machine wasn't the breaking point. its when he turned on the stove and put a bunch of bottle rockets on it that i knew the night had prematurely failed
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
Unless you're gonna start buying my underwear, you have got to stop ripping it off of me.
So who was trying to make it rain last night in the bathroom? There are pieces of dollar bill everywhere
I would love a rich wife. Then I would be like a gym teacher or some shit. Bigfoot hunter maybe.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If my birthday doesn't end with my panties hanging from a ceiling fan, I'm holding you responsible.
I don't care. She's the only girl to make me feel like my face is melting when she blows me.
Is it appropriate to send an apology gift to his roommates for breaking the bathroom sink during crazy sex?
He was 6'8" - I shit you not! He sat up in my bed and the ceiling fan got him right in the forehead.
I can get something to clone your cock for $40. It's worth it. It's my birthday present to myself.
OMG I CAN GET A GLOW-IN-THE-DARK ONE
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs
Randomize