I'm sad I can't be there is wknd, I'm laying on the beach and daydreaming of you / crying a bit
I'm watching a porn and daydreaming of you. Sounds like we both need Kleenex
There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
She can't meet us until 830...there's no hope for our sobriety at that hour
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
If he doesn't fuck you on the 4th of July, he doesn't really love this country.
I'm having leftover pizza for breakfast. I'm clearly not the greatest at this adult thing.
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
Thanks for DJing my sex last night. You were on point 💜
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
I often wonder if we’re introverted extroverts, but I don’t think so. I think we’re just easily tired scumbags
Randomize
