I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why do you think she gets more guys?
well her prof pic is her in her bedroom looking hot and mine is me looking terrified while holding a giant spider at 6 flags, so there's that
She was just a sweet cute intern for us until I saw her naked in my bed the day after the Christmas party
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
Winning the lottery was the best thing that ever happened to my penis.
Greatest pickup line ever: "We are out celebrating winning the lottery."
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
My booty call fought through ice and a foot of snow to get here. He brought booze, food, and cigarettes for three days. My vagina is the greatest motivator of all time.
Got caught peeing in public. Sucks. It was a police station. Sucks worse.
Fuck man, I am really high rn and all I've eaten is different forms of pie
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
Memeber that time you got detained in Poland. We don’t talk about that enough
Randomize