With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
My favorite part was walking in the bathroom, you fixing yourself in the mirror, calling your reflection a fag, then throwing a haymaker into the paper towel dispenser before going back out to the bar.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
My tweets this weekend consisted of me telling every bar I went to that they were my favorite valentine. I've never felt like more of an alcoholic
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Conversations we need to have while high 1) how mermaids reproduce 2) if blind people hallucinate what do they see 3) reincarnation
Tried to put an eye patch on while hooking up with a girl. She was not amused.
STOP HOOKING UP WITH SOCCER MOMS! YOU ARE RUINING MY REPUTATION!
How do you politely tell a guy that you only kissed him so he would shut the fuck up?
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like picking cocaine boogers out of your nose at your parents house.
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
Randomize