So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
I may have told her we're dating for a handjob, Fake tits are overrated.
She is totally STD
Is it a bad omen that my phone auto corrects dtf to STD
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
I don't care how high you are, you can't finger me while eating potato chips.
Her dog trainer Fuck buddy is over here again. She sounds like a squeaky toy and he talks to her like he talks to the dog. I CAN HEAR EVERYTHING!!!
"YOU A2TE UNDERAGE LOL" Got that at 2am. Gotta stop dating alcoholics.
I'm writing off my condom expenses in my taxes
The fact that you got a stranger guy to buy you a pizza off tinder makes me feel amazing
you asked the cab driver if he wanted to meet your parents, last night.
I bought the restaurant a boat airhorn to wake up sleeping employees.
I love you
it'll be like the notebook except for with way more of my penis
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
Randomize
