Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
I got cut off for calling the flower girl a slut. What are you doing?
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
I just had a dream that I was pulling you around downtown on a sled, from bar to bar. Dear lord if we start that there's no hope for us
Someone broke into my car and stole it then left me $300 to pay for the damages with a lovely note that said "we just couldn't pass up the boxed wine... Sorry about the window."
dude, no lie, I would make out with you in front of them wearing nothing but a rainbow colored speedo
He showed up at my door at 3 AM wearing a Santa hat with a tiara attached.
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
Man i fell asleep on a random persons porch on the way home and woke up to the family banging on the windows trying to wake me up
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
Weird, Jen didn't know mixers were solely for coloring purposes. Don't call me an alcoholic because you're uneducated
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
All I recall is being at the strip club doing dark rum shots and then puking a question mark on the wall above the garbage can in the men's room and having diarrhea in the sink. 6th drunkest I've ever been without blacking out.
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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