shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
I'm upset that MJ died and all but waking up to his face on my HDTV in the middle of the night while half-asleep is pretty much the scariest fucking thing ever.
I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
I just want you to know I tipped the cab driver $10 last night because I felt bad that he didn't have healthcare.
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
If i ever start ordering tequila again please tackle me to the ground and steal my wallet
Thankfully US customs doesnt have a checkbox for bringing semen into the country because my hair would still be in CDC quarantine
Tim and I found you a 5ish and asked how you were doing with the breakup. All you said was "i can't words"
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
I'll meet you in hell with unlimited boxes of wine though
I would have wore underwear last night if I knew I had to change a tire this morning
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
If I'm able to walk tomorrow morning, I'm gonna be really disappointed with myself...
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