Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
She got her phone back last night. And the first thing I sent her was a picture of me pooping in a culvers bathroom
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
I know everyone screamed lady cop instead of cops. I wanted to apologize to her for our chauvinism
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
It's like split custody, only he's not a kid and they have sex with him.
I have a new game. It's called "how weird can you act before a guy won't fuck you". I've deducted most guys are willing even if you're batshit insane.
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
BITCH I AM EXPERIENCING THE FEMININE MYSTERY SHUT UP AND GIVE ME DRUGS
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
God damn you Coronavirus! I'm jonesing I got the itch. I would fully satisfy a horse for some Taco Bell or Perkins. God help me I'm going insane but I definitely don't want to get sick.
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