she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
I wish they had an "I'm Stoned" genre on online Netflix
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
He was drinking a long island through his Breathalyzer tube.
Okay wait let me power puke and then we can go dancing
I'm at about main and main street
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
I GOT A VENDING MACHINE FOR OUR LIVING ROOM
JEREMY RENNER GOT DIVORCED. I STILL HAVE A CHANCE.
Do you remember telling the Uber driver that "his cologne makes you want to bone"?
Just got a blow job from a woman on a ski slope. She said ski'ing frightens her and giving head calms her down. Glad I could help ma'am!
Did you really have to freak out and get up half way through to put the cat in the closet?
...
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
Randomize
