Dual....:-)
There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
i just got a fart via voicenote. blackberry has officially changed history.
i wish semen tasted like chocolate
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
new years resolution, not be in jail at midnight for 3rd year in a row.
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
FYI: telling a guy his dick is more impressive than you remembered it - they don't take it as a compliment.
Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude.
Hey have you ever thought about fishing cause I'd like to go fishing but don't know anyone that fishes and I'm gonna cry because. FISHING
I love our relationship. We just get drunk, show each other our tits, demonstrate sexual positions and make pasta. Then you go to bed and I sit around with your mom and cry about how proud of you we are.
The horniest man in the world doesn't want sex as bad as I want pizza right now.
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
I swear to God...this day is one great big who's who in the land of fucked uppedness.
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
Randomize
