hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
Ducking stuck downtown...all the fuxkig roads are blixkded
sometimes in life you just needs hand puppets
Where are you? I just made a vodka + cranberry & I’m going to drive there & throw it in your face
Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
Now I know how you felt every time you had to listen to me have sex with a girl... mildly disguested yet marginally proud.
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
When I was with you my penis felt like a fat woman crammed into a pair of lulu lemons
I don't think we had sex because when I woke up he was still wearing the chicken suit.
How would I get in touch with Carly Rae Jepsen if I wanted to thank her for the loss of my virginity?
Our first order of business as new roommates was to test the sex acoustics of our rooms. I need a new box spring.
apparently while i was high i thought that putting a dinosaur temporary tattoo on my inner thigh would keep me from taking my pants off and having sex with him...
...it didn't...
Was make out with a 38 year old lesbian on our bucket list? if it was you can go ahead and cross that one off.
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