I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
he just found out his girl is having a boy. he's probably googling "Ed Hardy diapers" as we speak.
well..after leaving the bar you handed me your wallet and said you didnt need it cause you were going to find the cash cab and added 'i'll see you on tv'
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
I broke up with him in the bar & then asked him if he wanted to have a contest to see who gets the most numbers. I say I took that break up well
Yeah, he has a kid now! Shit... You know you're all grown up when the people you used to have threesomes with become parents
I just hate that one day I'll have to tell our children how we met, makes me look like a gold digging whore
Telling someone to make good decisions on a Thursday is like telling Santa to be Jewish.
He was spooning with the dog when I came home. Now shes afriad to go near him. Should I ask?
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
That was a very uncomfortable conversation to have without pants on. But his mom was pretty cool about it.
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
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